5 Signs You Found a Keeper
I spent a lot of my younger years looking for the *perfect* best friend like the ones in the movies. You know, the pairs like Leslie Knope and Ann Perkins, Corey Matthews and Shawn Hunter, Sam Puckett and Carly Shay.
But the truth is, no one is perfect and everyone will let you down in some way at some point (sorry, truth bomb). So what's worth getting over and what counts as grounds to move on? Its not linear and its not simple, but here are five signs you have probably found someone worth keeping around. Be it a friend, significant other, pet, whatever (:
On the flip side, do a little honest heart check and see if you do these things for your pals. We all need to be the friend we so desperately want.
5 Signs You Found a Keeper
//1// They love you at your very worst and your very best
They love you and they are consistently there for you. At the times when you're a gold-star best friend and the times when you cannot bear to think of anyone and anything other than your own needs. They are happy when you're happy, cry with you when you cry.
//2// They have your back, no questions asked
You call, they come. Sometimes there just isn't time for explaining, you just need the person you trust most to show up. We all like to think of ourselves as independent-- not needing anyone or anything. However, truth is, humans were meant to live in community. So, when the time comes that you need that person, they show up regardless of what else is going on.
//3// They want you to be the best you can be
They push you to be your best- gently suggesting you let bad habits go and push you toward your goals. Sometimes, this may lead to really difficult conversations, but it's all done in love and care.
//4// They apologize when they make a mistake
We all mess up and we all let down the people we love most, but what sets these people apart is that they apologize and make it right. They think about your feelings and needs.
***SIDE NOTE*** Make sure you actually let your pal know if they hurt you...turns out, no one is a perfect mind-reader all the time.
//5// They listen
They're not just waiting for their turn to talk. Like, they really listen to what you're saying and show it. They recognize that something doesn't always need to be said. That sometimes, just being present is enough and they remember the important things.
Simply put, being a good friend is essentially just being there.
3 Signs It Might be time to say "Buh Bye"
At some point, you may realize that the people you are closest with are not reciprocating the care and love you're putting out. It may be time to move on, for your own well-being.
//1// They talk bad about you behind your back
If you didn't know, things you say about people come back around and they're likely going to be told to the person you bad-mouthed. We're all guilty of this at times, but hopefully you're working on it like me and you're definitely not talking bad about your closest friends.
//2// They tear your down
They don't have your best interest in mind and they don't celebrate your attributes. Instead, they only remind you of your imperfections and this, my friend, is waaaay unhealthy. This would be a good time to decide you deserve better and you can respectfully set some boundaries.
//3// They give advice according to their ulterior motives
Again, they don't have your best interest in mind. They try to manipulate into doing things that would better them, regardless what it means for you.
If you're realizing that you may need to set some boundaries with people in your life, check out this post to help you get started.